A man named Leroy is drinking in a bar and President Clinton is
giving an address on the radio in the background.  Leroy looks at the
bartender and says, "yeah, me and Bill go a long way back, used to
hang out together and do alot of fun things before he became
President...".  The bartender looks at him and tells him he doesn't
believe him.  Leroy asks for the phone, dials the White House and
asks for "Bill"; he talks for awhile joking and laughing and
presently hands the phone to the bartender who is flabbergasted to be
talking to the President of the United States.
     A couple of weeks later, Leroy comes back into the bar.  They
are watching a golf tournament and Jack Nichlas (sp?) comes on the
screen for a putt.  Leroy is like: "Yeah, ole Jack and I go way
back...".  At this the bartender figures Leroy is full of crap so he
bets him 20 dollars that Leroy is trying to put one over on him.
Leroy grabs the phone and dials and presently is talking animatedly
with someone who seems to be named Jack.  Bartender steals a glance
at the TV screen and sure enough, Jack is talking on a cellular
phone; Leroy hands over the phone and the bartender just shakes his
head as he discovers that sure enough, it IS Jack on the phone and he
hands over his 20 dollars.
     About a week later Leroy comes in once again and this time the
Pope is on the television giving a televised benediction.  Leroy is
like...Yeah, the Pope and I go way back, to before he became Pope and
now the bartender is sure that he has him.  After the bet the men
purchase airfair and fly to Rome for the moment of truth because the
bartender is thinking the phone wont be good enough for this one.
     They are standing in the crowd at the Vatican watching the Pope
and as the Pope finishes the Mass, Leroy works his way through the
crowd, up the steps, and the bartender is amazed to see him shake
hands and the conversation appears to be that which would be expected
between long acquaintances.
     Presently, Leroy and the Pope come out into the crowd to meet
the bartender and Leroy sees the bartender sprawled flat on his back,
passed out cold, and looking pale.  He splashes water over his face
and shakes him until the bartender finally starts to come out of it.
"What happened" asked Leroy.
     The bartender replied: "While you were talking to his holiness,
this little old lady tapped me on the shoulder and demanded to know
who it was that was up on the dais with Leroy?"